Hold that tablespoon of ice-cream right there.
So you’ve broken up and your well-meaning friends and family want to help you put away the Ben&Jerry’s so they spew forth these ‘helpful’ relationship breakup cliches. Only problem is, they’re not true. Here’s the most common you’ll likely hear and why they’re wrong.
Myth No. 1: If you were never officially boyfriend/girlfriend, then you have no reason to be upset.
The truth: If you spend a significant amount of time with someone you inevitably get attached. Exhibit A – a friend of mine, let’s call her Olivia, dated a guy on and off for six years. She really liked him. Then he ended it with her officially after stringing her along for so long. A year has passed since this happened to her and she still hasn’t gotten over him. Exhibit B – another friend of mine, let’s call her Therese, dated a guy for five years; she ended it with him and was over it in three weeks.
Myth No.2: It takes half as long as you dated someone to get over them.
If this where the case, then people who were married for 20 years would have to wait 10 years to be over their ex? No thanks. You can’t put an expiry date on these types of things – you’re just done when you’re done. In some cases, you may never be done (great).
Myth No. 3: You need to find a rebound.
This will work – until this faux relationship inevitably ends. Then you’ll be right back to square one and missing your ex.
Myth No. 4: The only way to get over someone is to eat multiple jumbo sized tubs of ice cream and watch an unlimited amount of chick flicks.
The only thing that this will help with is weight gain. Save yourself from having to work twice as hard at the gym when you’re cured of your heartbreak and get yourself moving now. Plus exercise releases endorphins so that’ll actually, scentifically-proven help cheer you up.
Myth No. 5: If you’re going to be at a party together then show up looking fabulous and ignore him.
Lame. How old are you again? If you spent a significant amount of time with someone you at least owe them the courtesy of a “hello”.
Myth No. 6: You should stay friends with him on Facebook to show him how chilled you are about it all.
No! If you don’t want to be friends with him then just don’t. You don’t need to prove anything to him any more.
Myth No.7: He’ll be a better boyfriend for the next girl, thanks to you.
No darling, let’s be honest. He’s probably never going to change – he didn’t before so why would he now?
Top image screen shot from Aquamarine.