Questions that have plagued men from the dawn of time…
The female psyche is a dark and foggy minefield that men are often forced to sprint across with a blindfold on. We shed light on some of the age old mysteries…
Why do women go to the bathroom in groups?
The ladies bathroom is like a mini-ecosystem. There are nesters – the girls who have claimed a stall for the night. They’re sprawled out with their bag and jacket on the floor, tear stained cheeks and their iPhone clutched in their hand waiting for a text from their love interest while their gal pals nod and agree sympathetically.
There are parasites – abandoned by their friends and wandering the bathroom for a new group to cling to. A total mess, they ask to borrow your lip balm and then stick to you for the rest of the night like a bad smell.
Other girls swarm, synchronised like a school of fish, around the mirror. Passing the communal lip gloss, checking each others teeth, fluffing their hair. It’s a whole world that men are unaware of, and it’s a sacred bonding experience that women share for those few minutes.
Why are their bags so big?
Because women’s clothes don’t have pockets. It’s a privilege that men take for granted every day. The pockets in our pants are fake, or sewn shut, or too small to be worth anything. So we’re forced to carry a bag, and by that point it’s really just go hard or go home. If you have to keep a bag with you for the whole day, you may as well put everything you could ever possibly need into it. Tissues, makeup, deodorant, a change of clothes, wood varnish, a newborn pterodactyl… you never know where the day will take you. Might as well be prepared.
Why do girls always say the opposite of what they mean?
This question has no direct answer, but knowing that women speak in opposites could save your life someday.
“Okay, go have fun.”
“She seems really nice.”
“I’m not angry.”
“It’s totally fine.”
These statements mean that you must tread cautiously, assume you have made a terrible mistake, and begin making amendments immediately.
These questions and more are answered in our video where we took to the streets to confront unsuspecting females for some honest answers. – Newsha Tari
Top Photo from IamKhatu’s Flickr photostream.